Just like that, we're in the second trimester baby! I love that you're a girl! Our little Brooklyn Joanna.
And that means Pumpkin Patch with our friends! Emily had the nerve to get pregnant 3 months before me!, I kid! I actually lucked out cause they weren't planning on this lil babe, he just decided they needed him! And I'm actually very grateful for that! I think being pregnant at the same time has brought us even closer, she has 2 other littles so Im always picking her brain about what I can and can't eat. What's the best baby stroller, swaddles, carriers... I swear she knoes it all and should blog about it!
We met up the street at the farm last night, and perfect timing too! The sun was setting and the pumpkin patch hadn't been picked clean yet! We took turns snapping photos of our bumps!
YES YES YES!!! I knew it! Before we were even trying to get pregnant, before I convinced Bobby that a reversal was a great idea I would say, "Babe! I just know there is another baby in heaven waiting for us! There a little girl! And I JUST KNOW she's ment to be ours!!" I fell in love with the name Brooklyn. I'd say, " Just think! A lil Brookie Jo in our family! A little sister for McKenzie!!" Oh how I wanted a little sister for her!! I love mine! People would say, " I bet its a boy!" or <" I just have a feeling youre having a boy!!" Oh how my pregnancy hormones would rage. And deep down inside I'd have to calm myself because I could vividly imagine THROAT PUNCHING them!! Sounds silly now, but I just knew it was going to be a girl! I had even been buying girl items for over a year! Seriously that stock pile in my closet is legit!
I wanted the reveal to be special for Bobby and the kids! We waited 2 weeks befor ethe results for all our testing came back, I got the phone call from the Drs office saying the baby was totally healthy and they asked if I wanted to know the gender. Duh, It's a girl. I calmly thanked the nurse and hung up. The plan from the beginning was to let Bobby blow something up, so I packeged the pink and blue powder in black trash bags, I marked the bag with the pink powder with a tag that had a blue one, and the bag with the blue powder, a pink 2. We drove out to the desert, set up the tannerite and then Bobby said,"Okay, go place the bag!" I reached in the box grabbing the blue 1 bag, and carefully walked out to set it up. As I was walking away I heard McKenzie say, " I think I know what it is... Oh man its a boy!" But not in a happy voice, she started to BALL!!! " I saw a blue mark! Its Blue. I really wanted a sister!!" Boy did she lose her shit!! She was beyond upset. I just kept telling her "Just wait and see! Maybe I tricked you!" But she wasn't having it. She was going to have another little brother and her world was over!
Bobby shot the explosive and PINK powder went everywhere! I looked back at McKenzie and she had her hands over her nose and mouth. AGAIN, she started to sob uncontrollably!! She was an emotional wreak! We had taken her from her lowest low to her HIGHEST high and her little heart just couldn't take it! LOL. She cried for a good 20 minutes before she was able to pull it together! Everyone is thrilled! Even Zac! He says he's excited to have a little sister! And Bobby is happy to have another princess!
Boom! Here we are again with another 2 weeks and another #Bumpdate! This week was a big mental turn for me. When I found out we were going to try and have a baby, I was very excited to document it all, share our journey. Maybe work with brands and get some cool stuff for the baby and the nursery. But then, I don't know. Something shifted. Here I am. I'm finally having this 3rd baby I've wanted for years and.... All I'm thinking about is how can this up my social game? What? It's not me. And I hate being surrounded by an environment like social media where the pressure to share "Re-postable Worthy" images is so strong!! I was constantly looking at my followers number and thinking, "Why didn't that get me any new people?" O "why didn't this photo get more likes?!" "What am I doing wrong?!!!"
I'll tell ya whats wrong. Suddenly I was living for what everyone else thought. When the whole game plan was to document this journey for ME and our Baby and our family to look back on! So last Saturday I took that power back. I switched my instagram accounts and Kept my personal one private. Now I share my fun images but their on my account where I no longer worry about the number of likes, because Im not posting for others! It's honestly taken so much weight off my mind and has allowed me to enjoy my family and this pregnancy leaps and bounds more! Im not after that perfect shot! Im after one to just remember this moment! Perfect lighting or not!
So, Here I am 12 weeks out. I have my coffee now, not daily but a few times a week. I could go my whole life without alcohol but take my coffee... I could cry!
Lets play some catch up shall we? It's crazy to say I feel like this pregnancy is flying by!! Here I am trying to savor the moments, but theres really nothing going on, each morning I wake up I dont feel any bigger then I was yesterday, or the day before, lol. Here's my 10 weeks photo!
I have dreams every night now, I can usually remember them in the the morning. Nothing deep or meaningful. Usually weirdo dreams like... Oh! I have a dream I was on the beach and 2 sharks came rushing out of a wave onto the shore, and they had a seal in their mouths. They were thrashing back and forth trying to split this seal, when suddenly they weren't sharks, they were now grizzle bears. I was trying to warn everyone on the beach, "Get back!!" I yelled. "They're coming this way!!!" Then the life guards came in their cars and four wheelers to handle the situation, but I woke up. Weird right? lol
Polka Dot Print Shop has THEEE cutest Bump books so that you can start journaling your baby bump journey! I looked all over Barnes & Noble for a baby book that was cute, didnt ask lame questions, tracked the info I wanted it to track. But, NOPE. No such book existed until I found the Polka Dot Print Shop on Instagram!! Dream journal for sure!
It was just what we needed for Labor Day, A 3 day getaway up to Brain Head. They had the Country Jam going on, so there was music and beer and food, ziplines, rockwalls, so much stuff for the kids! Our good friends came up and stayed in the cabin with us, I love our friendship because we're both photographers so theres little I'll scratch your back, you scratch mine, I snap a few photos of her and she snaps a few of me! I wasn't planning on announcing our pregnancy just yet, but after seeing these photos I couldn't wait. this is so us! Casual, adventuring! I had to share!
Guess what?!?! We're having a baby!!!!!!!! - Instagram Announcement Sept-4th
A HUGE thank you to my friend Brittney for taking these amazing shots for us!
Wanna hear a joke? PANTS! lmao. well they are a joke to me, or the for sure were at 8 weeks, It's like my hips popped out 3 inches and although I could still barely button my jeans, theres no way in hell i could sit in them! We, and by we, I mean I, broke down this week and bought 3 pairs of maternity jeans, Its hard to find cute distress skinny maternity jeans. It like ordering a Non-fat, decaf double with a twist, at a coffee shop. The women at the counter look at you like, "What? You want light blue,but not TOO light blue, distress but not TOO distress skinny maternity jeans? Umm heres some mom jeans, get over it." I made Bobby go with me and we hunted high and low till I found a pair that was "Amie" approved. Pink Blush Maternity on line had some great options too, if they ever get a pair in stock in my size!
Grocery shopping can suck it. I wanna gag every time I walk by meats and cheese. Cause I smell it all! I've lucked out in the morning sickness department, I feel a little woozie, (thats a word right?) from time to time, but I have YET to throw up! Fist pump in the air! Im owning this pregnancy! Im out of breath just thinking about making dinner but hey, I have a miracle in my belly and I'll let the fam fend for themselves tonight!
Every 2 weeks is the plan. I don't want to over kill it and 2 weeks gives us enough "Change" I think.
So maybe Im trying to push it out a little bit here. lol
Holy Sh*T! We did it!!! 1st try!! I have been waiting 8 years to see that positive pregnancy test! 8 YEARS!! I know everyones thinking, well that was fast, but for me it was the longest time coming!! I had dreams of hold our baby, I knew her name. What she looked like. Yes Im saying she, we dont know the gender yet but in my dreams she was the realest of reals. I felt like the dreams were glimpse into the future, I knew in my heart we were going to have another baby. I wrote in my journal, Pregnant in July, baby in April. I pictured being pregnant in my mind. My husband holding another baby, the kids laying on the floor with her. For SO long!
I bought one of those, "Find out 6 days before your missed period test" I was taking a test everyday probably 8 days before my missed period, and oh how my heart hurt when it would say not pregnant. We went to vegas for a weekend, ate alot of great food, kids swam we sun bathed. I didnt have any drinks, although I wanted an ice cold beer so bad! But I felt guilty. I kept telling myself " I'm pregnant. I need to be acting like it." From the beginning I ate right, stayed hydrated. I took a test the morning of Monday before we checked out. I think my period was supposed to start that coming Friday. I snuck off into the bathroom. Peed on the test. waited, Bobby was yelling," Hurry up in there were heading out!" Waiting waiting... In my brain I was envisioning a positive test and running out to Bobby saying " We're having a baby!!!" And I imagined the whole drive home just beaming,holding my belly with my poppy seed size nugget in there. I could feel the joy! I was tingling waiting for that positive sign!!
And then, there was no positive sign. there was one line. My heart dropped. I mean this was 5 days before my missed period right? So this must be the truth, right? He didn't know that I took the test so I quickly shoved it in my pocket, walked out of the bathroom trying to act like, "Oh I'm totally cool. Just had to pee." I secretly threw the test in my suitcase, zipped it up and away we went to check out.
It was hot in Vegas, our car, even parked below the Cosmopolitan was hot. Suit cases were thrown in the back and we headed home. When we got home it was still hot, we were all so tired that we left the suitcases in the car to retrieve later that night. I actually didnt open mine to unpack till the next day. The kids were at school, Bobby was at work and I thought, "Well, I better start cleaning!' Started to put my dirty clothes away when that dang test fell out of the pile. I knew I needed to go throw it away, so I picked it up and took it into the bathroom, I didn't want to see its stupid negative face again. But I looked. What the.... is that.... no... what? A faint second light pink line was staring at me. Well my suitcase was left in the hot car, it probably messed with the chemicals or something along that line. But my heart skipped and my mind raced anyways! Shoot! I already peed this morning, I need to wait till tomorrow to take another test! But I didnt wait! lol. I took another test. Son. Of. A. Bitch. there it was. That faint 2nd line again. Dose this mean? YUP!!!! Omg, omg, omg!
I cant tell you how many more test I took. Freaking pinch me. Everyday it was like I woke up to take a test to make sure I wasn't dreaming! I finally bought a digital one because I needed to see the word "PREGNANT" Best $7 I ever spent!
I thought before hand how I wanted to tell Bobby. I had some pretty creative ideas, but when I saw that 1st test I lost all self control. I sent him this photo and I said," Does this mean..." I waited for his reply. He called me. " Whats it a picture of?" He asked... What does he think its a picture of? Lol. He was out of service and the photo wouldnt load, he just saw my words. "What does what mean?" He asked. Oh man, lame phone service!! I said, "I sent you a photo of a pregnancy test!" "And?" He asked. "And, we're having a baby." I replied. There were alot of "Seriously's, and whaaaaaat? and omgosh's. He was instantly in love. We're 10 weeks now, and he's seriously the most amazing partner I could ask for. He lets me take naps, brings me bottles of water at night time, his hand is ALWAYS on my belly, even though I feel like I dont have a solid belly yet and I just look chubby. I can't wait to see him hold his baby. I can't wait to watch him nap and talk to them. My heart could burst and I could drown in tears right now because I feel like Im dreaming.
The first step. It was the LONGEST night of my life the night before. Im pretty sure it was for Bobby too. We drove up to Logan, UT June 15th and stayed the night. We tried to make it fun by going out to dinner at Kneaders. But I could tell Bobby was stressed. He's biggest fear was that they were going to put him to sleep on the operating table and he wouldn't wake up. He had been google worst case scenarios, which everyone knows NOT to do.
I kept reassuring him that everything was going to be fine, that they were only going to lightly sedate him!. The morning came way, way sooner then we thought it would. we showed up, it was tricky finding the office but luckily a nurse that worked in that office was outside grabbing supplies and showed us in. We sat in the waiting room, filling out papers when Doctor Ryan Larsen Came out and greeted us. He asked us questions about Bobby original vasectomy and answered any questions I had about the reversal. And then escorted us back to the room where the procedure would take place.
It wasn't quite what I was expecting, and my stomach started to get all knotted up. The nurse started an IV for bobby and informed him that he would soon start to feel sleepy and to just go with it. Ummm... Bobby's worst case, they were knocking his ASS OUT! He looked at me like," You said I wasn't going to sleep?! WTH?" Oh man I felt so bad!
Im so thankful I was allowed to be in there. I stood at the head of the table, rubbing his cheeks, telling him I loved him and that I was right there. Then, once everything was set they put a warm blanket on Bobby, monitored his oxygen and blood pressure, Dr.Larsen went to work. He communicated with me the whole time. Telling me how good everything looked and he was happy with the connections. Bobby of course never fell asleep, he fought the IV hard the whole time. Dozing for minutes at a time.
Once everything was stitched up and good they gave him a nice big ice pack, wished us luck and set us on our way. I drove us home about half way, (5 hour drive total) and somewhere around point of the mountain the sedation had worn off and my husband was back to himself. Although I did enjoy his silly banter along the way! lol We stopped at a Starbucks, grabbed a drink and light late breakfast, traded seats and continued home. Once we got home he went straight to bed, Ibuprofen and Ice packs were his best friends for the next 4-5 days.
In the mean time I had been tracking my ovulation and trying to learn as much as I could about fertility. He had done his part and thats all he could do, it was up to me now to figure out when our best chances of conceiving was and what extra steps we could take to help us out!. I had started us on One A Day brand vitamin pack for couples trying to conceive. I like to think they helped! I stayed super hydrated, drank a shit ton of water and tracked tracked tracked! I used Clear Blues ovulation kits, I wish I had just gone with the Clear Blue Advanced from the begining because It really broke it down to, Not ovulating, Getting Close, NOW!!! Where the other one was just a your ovulating or you're not.
I remember taking this photo. I used both test, Just to make sure! Cause if one was like YES! And was said no, I knew we'd have a problem, but they both gave me thumbs up and I was on the phone with Bobby within Minutes. "Its game day partner!! Were playing for the championship and you need to get your booty home, NOW!" Your stuck with me for the next 24hrs! Hahahaha
The babe that does it all! Beauty, Fitness and Mommin'
Hands down, my husbands most favorite gifts are watches! And when they are wood watches for JORD, thats it people! I can walk out of the room at the top of my game! They come in all shades and shapes! This one is from their new hyde collection, you can find it here. Walnut and black. Easy to size yourself and incredibly durable!
Short and Simple is how I'd like to keep it. Just another family adventure to the North Rim, We brought Bobby's Grandma along, It was nice to get her out and adventuring again since grandpa passed away in march.
Waking them up early to make their own pancakes. I mean, I had the batter ready and a variety of mix ins just waiting for them. We're they thrilled and excited at the idea of their own custom pancakes?! NOPE. It took a few minutes for them to wake up and get into the idea. It wasn't until I threw the option of food color into the mix that they actually got on board! So pink and blue pancakes with unlimited sprinkles, chocolate chips and all the whipped cream you can imagine, is exactly what we had for breakfast!
When I get a chance to photograph my best friend and her babies, You bet Im aallllllllll over that oppertunity!